It's Coming Together
I see a permanent transformation within myself that I know is different than all the other changes I've witnessed in my lifetime. I have found the love of writing and I have embraced it with a sincerity like never before.
I never saw myself writing books, let alone books of fiction. Yet, I am in the midst of writing my first fiction book called REM State.
I have committed myself to rising before dawn and writing at least 500 words a day. I also try to learn something associated with writing every evening before turning in for bed. I am so excited about the change that has happened within me, and I know this change is permanent. The desire I have is strong, because I have found my passion. passionate_calling
My search, my journey was not made in vain. Through the tears, the frustration, the confusion and sadness, I found it! It was right in front of me the entire time. I am ready to sacrifice my time and whatever else to ensure that I live out my passion. I have kept it buried for far too long, and now I've pulled it out of it's deep grave I dug for it many years ago, cleaned it off, and now I indulge in it, laugh with it, dance with it, play with it. I love writing and it loves me right back! passion
I never thought I'd see this day. I never thought that I could wake up saying today is a fabulous day and I am great, and I am perfect because I am God's creation! I never thought that I could be optimistic about my life or my future.
Though, I will admit that there are plenty of times when fear will attempt to corrode crevices of my mine with what-if's. What if I die tomorrow? What if I waited to late and North Korea starts a war? What if just when I'm about to self-publish my first book or just about to make my first million the internet flat lines?
Those thoughts play in my head daily, and I spend a lot of time fighting them with optimistic responses, or ignoring them altogether. I know that fear is trying to stifle my creativity, smother my motivation, and kill my dreams in order to totally eliminate me from fulfilling my purpose. IMG_4913
But, God brought me through chaos and confusion. He coached me through frustration and depression. He sang and kissed me to sleep at night, and protected me during the day from all the things seen and unseen. He knows my life is invaluable, because He created me to do great things! And even though evil desperately attempts to whisper discouragement in my ear, God will not allow me to be defeated!